What does it feel like to wake up at 3am to shocking news. I was unable to sleep afterwards. The country I grew up loving as a child has become something I no longer recognize. 

I might be cold when I walk outside but I’d rather be cold then surpressed or told that my aspirations no longer matter. Maybe it’s the crotch grabbing new not my president. How come a reporter loses his job & he wins. There’s something seriously wrong with that logic. 

I count my blessings when I go to bed, lucky to be out. Maybe I’ll just stay out? 

It’s been a while since I’ve written anything. Things are still progressing & I am getting excited. Excited for a change of pace & a different outlook. 

Today I ate lunch at one of my favorite restaurants after a Long morning & I am not a morning person. Well sort of. 

A change is a coming & even though there’s places & people I will miss change is good! It’ll be great to experience a real winter again & maybe some amazing nature. 

Thank you to all of you who have seen me & not my illness or issues. I hope to see you in the future over a short latte..

16 years & here I am reflecting on the bubbles-the places that made my heart race & the friendships. Seattle has changed, it’s morphed into something I no longer want. The bubbles are all the places I will come back to; the rest I am more than happy to leave behind.

Maybe it’s the amholes that have taken over SLU or that Google is building bubbles for people they will hire from CA that will find Seattle *cold* in the winter time… or maybe it’s the national politics. Racism, bigotry & the rise of the new anti-immigration sentiment. How often I have to explain that I have been in this country since Reagan.

I miss OLD Ballard, where the old people would drive down the street with their blinkers on & hatties was the only place you could get liquor on a 2nd Saturday. Microsoft & amazon was the only gig in town for the robots & the hackers. I miss the neighborhoods before they became gentrified & full of angry trophy wives all dolled up with their strollers.

I am grateful for my friends who I will miss dearly & coffee places where no one has broken my heart. The constant planes over our house/walks to the train/discovery Park in the rain. The open mikes I loved where I’d wear my heart on the sleeve. The drives to the snow, to the PCT & a pint of Mannys with my pizza.

BUT I won’t miss the constant explaining of why I still BELONG to rude strangers, or amhole bots from the other part of the globe. Or the yuppies that drive to my *sketchy* neighborhood for pizza & jaywalk back to their cars. I won’t miss new Seattle; I will miss the OLD.