since, this Summer i have been shook by an officer shooting a Native woodcarver who was deaf in one ear after shouting at him for a mere 7 seconds. the woodcarver was not facing the officer as all the bullets entered one side of his body. not only is this officer poorly trained but he should be brought up on manslaughter charges for his killing of an innocent man. today the inquest jury came back with their verdict which was mostly mixed.

one of the reasons why i think he should get manslaughter charges is that in Summer of 07 when i was spiraling i ended up @ house and the police surrounded it at the time i raised a chair on porch up out of fear & the police told me to drop threatening to tazer me if i did not. although they arrested me; i had committed no crime.

if the officer that shot the woodcarver had been on duty that Summer i would be dead as would countless other mentally unstable & people that are deaf. his senseless lack of how to communicate with the Native American population along with city poor shows he should not be able to carry badge or a loaded weapon. i can’t get the picture out of my head where he mi micks a complete lie on the stand.

since i volunteer locally with a non-profit that specializes in helping people with mental illness and their families i find this disturbing and scary. the local population has a high rate of undiagnosed mental illness and it’s not a poor people’s problem because anyone can in fact suffer from a mental illness & because of the stigma associated with finding a diagnosis many do not seek treatment when it’s badly needed.

from my point of view having a the inability to confront someone in a calm manner before killing them is in fact a sign of mental illness. the rush to violence & the reasoning that you should only have to explain yourself after it has happened shows a true disconnect between being rational & irrational. this however reminds me of the calculated killing in Arizona; & how his insanity defense will be disputed in court. i see the local officer that was fired the same way. just because you carry a badge does not give you the right to senselessly kill innocent civilians without recourse.

well, i am going to try to attempt to write this while making Scandinavian porridge i have to check on every 10 minutes. making it basically requires that you babysit the stove.

i have noticed the last 2 months that my wedding ring has become a deflector shield of sorts. homage to star wars. since i am very active the local community i am often crossing the city from one end to the next & still find that i am being checked out. or as a good friend of mine once said to me. *you still got it.*

since my childhood i have never been big on attracting attention & i am usually in sneakers or my blundstones which are scuffed because i love wearing them so much. always in jeans. i have been running my errands & going to volunteer without wearing it & (there’s the timer. be right back.) found myself nearly run down while crossing the street.

sometime last week i was hurrying as i was meeting my husband & was unlucky enough to nearly be *bumped* into in the cross walk by a guy that was too fat and too slow. i raised my hand flashing my ring & cleared a path appeared. it’s also why i call it a deflector shield. because essentially that’s what it has become.

i have never thought of myself as good looking or beautiful. i grew up in the mud & in trees and make-up is something i have only worn for my wedding. i attended a party last night where the only thing i wore was gloss. hence, the constant attention is something that if it’s the wrong guy is uncomfortable & if it is a desperate guy becomes a challenge for them.

i have written @ length about poly & why i am against multi-partner relationships. yes, i can hold conversation. i am educated. multi-lingual & have good knowledge of other countries outside the US; BUT the ship has sailed. my new favorite line is mentioning my husband in the same context as the place i am going or mentioning him in my first sentence.
it’s an excellent way to spot d-bags that because of their *creative lifestyles* will remain eternally single.