19 years ago I made the mistake of dating a black hat programmer. The mistake had a impact on my life I didn’t expect. I had a tough time trusting other men after & the damage was psychological & brutal.
I saw all the red flags right away but ignored them because I wanted to believe that he was a better person But alas he was not. The spark I felt became a distant memory when he hung a camera up in his bedroom. He wanted to “share” our sex life with gawd knows who?
I drew the line & when he had two separate hard drives I knew something didn’t add up. The icon for porn on his computer & the sketchy “friends” he had in his life where no better.
I called off the relationship but he wouldn’t take no for an answer. He has never stopped stalking me, until I left the US. He would show up every 6 months like clock work. I think he had a tracker on my phone?
I learned after moving that I was Lucky for getting out of it soo fast. Now, I’ve moved on & am in healthy relationship with good boundaries. It took a long time to process the remnants of the toxic relationship. But I got out intact & that’s all that matters.