Make lemonade

So, this week started off with a sick four legged creature & more calls to the vet. It’s a beautiful day out but I am afraid to leave him as he got sick this morning. He seems sluggish & tired so it felt best to be home.

Even though it’s a beautiful Spring day, sometimes you’ve to sacrifice. Such is life. I was pressured this week into something I have no interest in. Thanks to my bestie, she put me straight & put her foot down. Would you send a greeting to someone that once repeatedly wanted you to kill yourself & in the end tried to kill you?

I didn’t think so, so I am simply not doing it. They’ve never had morals to begin with. Why should I feel guilty when their behaviour hasn’t changed. I think Not. I am in awe over how many of their friends they’ve justified the assault. As if my father attempting to kill me is somehow “normal”& should be accepted as such.

I have logged too many hours in therapy not to see the writing on the wall. In the past 20 years I’ve been in therapy for over half of it. Much of centered around my highly toxic childhood & adulthood. The damage they cost my life is extensive & to pretend that we’re “normal” is simply bull****.

Per example I wished one of my parents friends who Very much knew of the abuse & enabled it “happy birthday,” the reply I got was “get a job.” This is from a third party that knew how bad my high school years where & chose to Not report my parents. Shame on you.

So, if I get a job, he’ll be last to know. Why because he’s just as toxic as my parents. Anyway, it makes me grateful for the time difference & the distance. I can’t get my up bringing back but I am tired of catering to a mom who acts like she can still dictate what I do in my life.

Boundaries are important & it’s about damn time I used mine. It’s my Life.

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