I was watching TV last night & stumbled upon a documentary on a Monster who violated women for over 30 years, he almost got away with it. But in the end he didn’t. Sexual predators are that sexual predators, they don’t care what or how they treat a woman as long as they have Control & threats & intimidation is they try to keep you inline after they have violated you. #metoo is essential in this day & age of tinder & online dating. No means NO, it doesn’t mean I have to think about it, it means I am uncomfortable with what the situation is & want OUT. Period.
I was raped in college & held captive in a dank & gross dorm room & after he was done with me he forced me to shower. He called me a Fallen Angel something I have never forgotten. He forced me to drive him to a railroad station because he had to rescue a female friend in the city. I found out later that he had done it to several women in my town so I was just seen as a conquest & trophy. He stole my virginity & my trust in men. 10 years after his conquest & rape of me he contacted me & acted as if he done nothing wrong. I won’t go into the details of my response but it was blunt.
This culture that men can take whatever they want, when they want needs to Stop. As a rape survivor I count my blessings with my husband of the past decade as he knows me really well & understands what makes me uncomfortable. When you have been held by a Monster in a dorm room, you no longer find confined spaces particularly comfortable. I also don’t respond to whistling on the street or shouting. THAT is harassment. Period.
In the documentary one of the women that had been violated spoke about attempting to get her sexuality back after he had taken it from her. I know I did the same thing, baby steps, one foot in front of the other. When my husband says that I look good, I can accept that now. But if other men cat call or make a comment I get uncomfortable. It has to do with TRUST. With my male friends it’s one thing, with a stranger it’s another. #metoo should NEVER go away, as long as there’s predatory men out there. I will raise my voice. I was silent for way too long.