Maybe you really like hazelnut syrup in your coffee but for me it reminds me of when I was sodomized in my early 20’s. This weekend my hubby & I have talked about my life in the early 20’s & the trauma I have survived. It was a tough conversation but a productive one. In the age of men like Kavanaugh it’s time to get real about rape.

It happens to 1 out of 3 women in their lifetime & it happened to me & my rapist contacted me almost a decade later thinking he had done *nothing* wrong. Something that speaks volumes about current American society. Blasey Ford had guts just like Anita Hill before her. Rape is destructive in the most elemental way. It effects how you view yourself & your body.

I cried in the shower when I was raped & he acted as if he was doing nothing wrong. I now have come understand that he wanted me to wash off the evidence so I wouldn’t have been believed if I had gone to the police. In the 1990’s I was persuaded to not go to the police so I wouldn’t be re-traumatized again by the system.

I can’t handle water from the shower on my head if I am bent down, it triggers flashbacks, however I don’t get emotional over the flashback thanks to years of therapy but it’s very uncomfortable. I don’t always like to wear skirts as I view it as a way to be violated on public transit. I do now, but in the US it made me very uncomfortable at the end.

Rape is Rape and NO means NO-and if a woman shifts her body weight or tries to take away your hand, you should probably STOP. Verbalizing NO when being over-powered is scary because you don’t know how your NO will be taken. It should be taken simply. NO.