six shots later….

of espresso i have found a topic @ bottom of my cup. i woke up this morning feel Very fatigued, having fibromyalgia for the past six years have taught me that there are days like this. this morning i had a previous engagement i ended up having to re-schedule, & taking a mini nap to get me going. since fibromyalgia has been diagnosed as a real disease i no longer get weird looks when i tell people i feel sluggish & my feet are dragging. just within the last year the medical community came out and stated what we all know that FMS is real. there are snappy commercials geared towards young, still functioning people like me.

having FMS is annoying because it can become disruptive & debilitating. when i was diagnosed after my heart was shredded a few years i began reading all the books i could find on the subject. of course most of them where the Worst case scenarios-my roommate at the time was blatant he told me to focus back on myself instead of all these books, i did. i also began cross training on a weekly basis & got in really good shape, the best shape i have ever been in. i still miss this small, dangerous staircase i ran up, at one point i was averaging nearly 24miles a week.

now, i am back at square one with my shoulder being sensitive after a deliberate assault from 2 years ago, i was told in physical therapy that i would never be able to run again as it’s too much jolting for my nerve in my left shoulder. i can manage and lift when i need to-and i attempted the gym a few weeks back & leaving my shoulder sore & painful. i miss the days when i would go running in the rain, and the park i walked through would be empty. i miss feeling the adrenalin rush that i had when i was done! i have tried pilates & really like how you gently ease into a adrenalin rush, &

work muscles i forgot i had. i also Have Time to write, even work on my poetry portfolio that i am trying to piece together for a stack of rejection letters. i was told in college that if i wanted to be a write/poet criticism is part of the job. i recently submitted to one of the top 5 printed poetry magazines in the nation & was told that they “considered” my entry. Not bad. it’s the tip of the snow, the avalanche point of submissions. hence, i will brace myself for what response i get on my new work when i finally put it all together in time for summer.

ban flat lattes go to the little guys!


%d bloggers like this: